


Letting Go

by Celinarose



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-17 00:17:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13065177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celinarose/pseuds/Celinarose
Summary: He tries everything until he's exhausted, just so he doesn't have to let her go.





	Letting Go

She was such a vibrant and cheerful presence, Rolf muses, that it is very unusual and almost unsettling when she was sick. She is a surprisingly quiet patient, especially given the severity of her disease. Nonetheless, Rolf has to keep working and he finds travelling and categorising new species has lost its charm without her dreamy smile by his side.

Her pale face grows paler on each of his visits, and he hates to leave it again every time. But they both know they could never afford the treatment without his job, and so there are no tearful goodbyes anymore.

Rolf feels guilty. He is told, many times, that he could not have done anything to prevent it, but he blames himself nonetheless. He is not an impatient man, but sometimes he finds himself screaming at the staff of St Mungo's for being unable to cure a simple "Muggle disease". He knows it is no such thing, but his frustration bursts out, leaving him apologetic afterwards. He knows Luna doesn't like it when he screams, so he tries to make sure he never does that in from of her, but, he has a feeling she knows anyway.

Initially, some of her friends would visit, ask about the Quibbler and encourage her. She would smile wearily at them, but he knew their presence provided her hope. But soon enough, they lost hope themselves. He never forced them to come back or even called them, if they didn't visit. He knew what it was like to walk into the ward, past all the other patients, each in a dire state themselves, and then finally come across her face, now so changed from what it used to be.

"Rolf," she declares one day, "I am going to die."

He is shocked at her declaration and he stares at her, unable to form any words at her declaration. She meets his gaze with a familiar calm evenness and continues speaking quietly.

"I don't mind it, " she says. He knows what she means. It is painful, and she, like any human, doesn't want to suffer anymore. He also knows she only tells him so he can prepare himself. To his own surprise, he finds he has been preparing for a while now. He has known it too, but it sat there like an elephant in the room before she addressed it.

Nonetheless, he wishes he didn't have to accept it. So he goes anywhere he thinks there might be a cure. Potions Masters, Healers, even Muggle doctors. She sees him running around, and tries to prevent it. She doesn't succeed.

At least, not until he receives a Patronus from one of the Healers, telling him the news. When he hears it, he freezes for a few moments. Then, he apparates to the hospital and rushes to her bed, only to find it empty. Beside a sheet covered stretcher nearby, stand some of her friends. They mourn her, and some of them have tears running down their cheeks. But he, _he cries and howls._ He sobs and denies it like a little child, until all of them have left. And then, he collapses to the ground, with a tearstained face, finally letting her go.

**_Notes: Written for the 12 Days of Christmas Day 1 at TGS!_ **

**Author's Note:**

> Notes: Written for the 12 Days of Christmas Day 1 at TGS!


End file.
